#batman again

[bentijon-trans-edition]

Hey guys you should play the 3ds batman game

[izukuer]

characters have to be a little bit awful in ways that you cant defend. its good for the ecosystem. your honor he did do that. He did in fact do that

[abisalli]

meow meow meow

[fact-dogsarehappiness]

Another reason why I’m a firm believer in letting Bruce get old is because the idea of him looking and his dark haired children without his glasses on and genuinely not being able to tell them apart is unparalleled

[redsray]

i love the idea of the batfam wearing each other's merch cause like. i know they'd be petty about it. usually they'd wear their siblings merch in (kinda) equal rotations, but they'd change it up depending on sibling squabbles or sibling favours. Tim, walking into the kitchen in a Red Hood shirt: Dick: TIM!? Tim: what Dick: it's Tuesday. you always wear Nightwing merch on Tuesdays. Tim: oh. Tim: you stole my last granola bar, last week. Steph, looking for something in Jason's room: JASON WHY DO YOU HAVE EVERYONE'S MERCH BUT MINE?! Jason, peeking into the room: i have your merch. in the trash. Steph: WHY Jason: you hit me with a blue shell in mario kart last game night. i'm never forgiving you. Damian, sporting a full-on Red Robin hoodie: Tim: woah. what brought this on? you usually only exclusively wear Batman or Nightwing merch Damian: you helped me take that splinter out of Alfred's paw yesterday. Richard on the other hand has recently messed up my painting palette. Dick, from the other room: IT WAS AN ACCIDENT! Damian: he'll get over it. Cass, wearing Nightwing merch for the 5th day in a row: Jason: goddamn. what did Dickie do to get in your good graces like this? Cass, smiling: he made me a flower crown Jason: ... that's it? Cass: it was a very nice flower crown. Dick, buying seven Signal shirts: One for everyone. Duke, behind him: Dick, you really don't-- Dick: shhhh, sunshine. everyone will love your new merch. (they all wore exclusively Signal merch for a week straight) Bruce isn't allowed to change up his rotation or not wear someone's merch because he immediately gets accused of playing favourites. He'd rather keep some of his sanity, thank you.

[duckysprouts]

if you were at your worst, if you’re a villain or a screwup or whatever, there is a goth man dressed as a giant bat who keeps coming after you, bothering you. he sabotages your journey of self destruction over and over. ur ready to give up but he won’t let you. you think, today he won’t come. today he will give up on me too. he never does.

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

Danny stared at the guy wearing what he could only describe as a superhero cosplay, complete with a cape, a mask, and a symbol on his chest. He had just gone to the lab to grab some spector deflectors for him and his friends since they would be gone on a camping trip for a few days, and his mom wanted them to be extra cautious.

Then this random guy showed up via a portal spawning in the middle of the lab holding the Fenton Portal Gun.

"Huh, so that's where that went." His dad had been showing it off at the breakfast table about a week ago and fired it as a demonstration. Unfortunately, the portal had suction and sucked the device right out of his dad's hand, and the portal snapped shut.

His dad had needed to be cheered up with emergency fudge after that.

In response to Danny's words, the guy gave a glare so chilling that Sam would be green with envy. Okay, maybe this guy was a villian.

Not so super guy pulled out a katana and pointed it in Danny's direction (more points towards villiany), "Where am I? Are you the one who made the device?"

"No? And this is my basement?"

Suddenly, another portal appeared, and a guy who definitely looked like a supervillian with little horns on his head walked through, holding what looked like a sleek black version of the Fenton Portal Gun. Bat logo, of course, because stealing tech and blueprints were never enough for these guys, was it?

The guy stood there glaring with his son(?) when Danny noticed a bat logo on the man's chest, and Danny realized the little horns were actually ears. Ha!

Bat guy starts growling out demands and threats but Danny didn't really pay attention. He'd heard worse from his own bad guys. He wasn't in the business of fighting human weirdos so instead he turned and yelled up the stairs, "Moooom! There's evil furries in the basement again!"

"What?!" His mom yelled back, already running towards them

[everwalldigan]

Bawling my eyes out at the thought of Dick’s last bit of parting advice for Damian on how to be Bruce’s Robin (before he went back to blud) being “just pretend to fall asleep during a stake out. Trust me”

Of course Damian’s sceptical and it takes him a long time to even THINK about making himself look that vulnerable but his curiosity eventually wins and he pretends to fall asleep during a boring night.

He thought he was prepared for all possibilities but he was not prepared for Bruce to call out his name, sigh softly and scoop him up, not letting go of him even once until they reach his bed (he will never admit it but he actually did end up falling asleep). He was absolutely not prepared for Bruce to take his shoes off, tuck him in and hesitate just a little second before giving him a forehead kiss and leaving the room silently. He ends up actually falling asleep on the very next week

[corkinavoid]

DPxDC Danny the Guy Who Won't Die

He lives in Gotham, and he is just A Guy. Nothing weird about him, he's just there to study/work/help Lady Gotham to lift her curse/on vacation with Sam. Point is, he is not there to cause trouble and there's no GIW on his tail. Just a dude living his (after)life.

And Gotham, being Gotham, still finds a way to be annoying. There are mugging attempts, robbery, Rogues running around. Only Danny really doesn't want to deal with any of it.

Now there's a dilemma. If he uses his powers to fight, it will sooner or later come to Bats' attention. And if he fights as a human, it will also alert some of the Bats since he doesn't really do a great job at keeping his power levels low. Not to mention the fact he is really not enthusiastic about accidentally punching someone hard enough he sends them to a hospital.

What does he do instead? He pulls the 'I guess I'll die' act.

So every time he is attacked, he just plays dead. The mugger shot him in the chest? He falls down and stops breathing. Caught up in the middle of a Poison Ivy attack? Skewers himself on the vine and goes lax. Scarecrow's Fear Gas? Very dramatically chokes himself and plays a corpse. He makes sure to disappear before any ambulances arrive later, and it all goes well for a few months - he is just a casualty, who cares, really - until one day, he runs into that same mugger who shot him in the chest a while ago.

The man does a double take. Danny doesn't notice - he's been mugged so many times, who has the brain capacity to remember all of those fuckers. But the rumor goes out anyway.

A guy-who-won't-die. It's more of a city legend, really, and the Bats don't give it much thought since, well, it sounds stupid and not very important. A rumor of some man who was shot dead and then showed up like nothing happened? Yeah, it's probably because the mugger didn't check if he was actually dead. That happens. Maybe it wasn't even the same man, Gotham is a big city. If anything, hey, at least that was one less casualty? That's a good thing.

That is, until one day, they show up to Joker's hostage situation and witness the clown screaming at one of the hostages. He is so enraged he is shaking, spit flying out of his mouth, and, contrary to the usual Joker's evil sneers and maniacal laughter, he seems just... furious. But, like, the normal-human-level furious. The 'I just lost the last ounce of patience with you' furious.

"Don't you look away from me, you think I don't remember you?! Na-ah, I do. You were the one I drowned in the shark tank last week! And you were the one run through the chainsaw trap two weeks before that! And you were in the guillotine!!! I saw your fucking head get deattached from your body, how the fuck are you here again?!"

And the guy he is screaming at just looks at him, confused and incomprehensive.

"Um, I'm pretty sure I'd remember getting my head cut off, you know? So, err, wrong guy."

"Wrong guy my fucking ass-"

Joker is so distracted by his screaming match that it makes it almost too easy for the Bats to fight him down and drag to Arkham. Yet, a few of them get just a bit suspicious.

Now, imagine all the shenanigans when they try keeping a watch on Danny the Won't Die Guy.

[melmov]

Batboys profiles

[littlefankingdom]

Bruce died(?) again

Jason: Well, it's my turn.

Dick: What are you talking about?

Jason: Everytime Bruce is gone, one of you starts to act just like him, pushing everyone away, acting as only you can be right, and fighting anyone that gets in your way. Dick did it, Tim did it, even Cass kind of did it. So, this time, I will do it.

Tim: Isn't that how you act all the time?

Jason: Whoa, fuck you. You are so banned from historical drama movie nights.

[massivetittiesandwarcrimes]

I need Dick to be completely delusional about Tim and consider him to be his nicest, most helpful, and most well-behaved sibling.

_____

Tim: I have never done anything wrong, ever, in my life.

Dick: I know this and I love you 🥰

Jason: ...Dick, are you fucking HIGH???

_____

Dick: You should consider trying to be more like Tim! He's always such a well-behaved angel ❤️

Tim: Thank you, Dick 😇

Damian:

________

Dick: Tim is very kind and always so polite! He would never be mean to someone on purpose! ❤️

Bruce, who is bullied by Tim an average of 4.5 times a day:

______

Dick: Tim is an absolute sweetheart!

Cass: ... I do not think that word means what you think it does.

_____

Duke, staring at a warehouse that he and Tim just 'accidentally' blew up: ... So how mad do you think Dick is going to be at us?

Tim: Don't worry, I got this.

Dick, landing next to them: Holy explosion, Red Robin! What happened here?!?

Tim: I don't know 😔. It was like this when we got here 🥺.

Duke, whispering: There is no way he's going to believe tha-

Dick: Oh no! Well, I'm just glad you two are safe!

Duke: ... Tim, I need you to teach me your ways.

Dick: hm? Did you say something, Duke?

________

Dick: I don't get it! Why does everyone think Tim is some kind of crazed feral gremlin?!?

Alfred: I believe that is because they have in fact met Master Tim.

Dick: What was that? 🙃

Alfred: ... 😮‍💨 Truly it is a mystery for the ages.

[sourkreem]

i hc that jason is concerningly good at obscure competitive video games, and that tim comes around his apartment at least twice a month

[gaywineauntsstuff]

How I picture Brucie Wayne’s birth in the battinson universe.

8yr old Dick Grayson: so B I gotta ask

Battinson: hn

8yr old newly Robin Dick Grayson: do you really think that people don’t suspect the crazy Rich secluded billionaire who disappeared for years to be Batman and then takes in a child only for ‘I’m vengeance’ to appear with a child at the same time.

Battinson: hnnn

DG: nonono like no offense but like don’t you think it’s a little …obvious… like marvel movies exist..

Battinson: hnnn what do you propose I do then?

DG: duh you gotta make sure it’s impossible for you to be Batman

Battinson: hmm so I should plan an event where we are both spot-

DG: get drunk and swim in a fountain

Battinson: ???

DG: if Bruce Wayne is dumb he can’t be Batman

Battinson: Bruce Wayne is the head of one the most successful companies in the worl-

DG nodding along: yep all thanks to the amazing help he hired to do the work for him while he search for the cure to polio in the Sahara desert

Battinson: the polio vaccine already exists Dick

DG hand placed on forehead like a fainting damsel: oh it’s so sad about poor Brucie you know, dumb as a rock that one. Didn’t get an ounce of his parents intelligence thank god he got lucky enough that the people he surrounds himself with are loyal to his parents and aren’t stealing money from him.

Battinson: Robin I’m really not followi-

DG rolling his eyes and grabbing B’s face: I’m telling you to play himbo with heart of gold. If people think you’re sweet and pathetic, they’ll (A) underestimate you (B) not question why you disappear for months (C) pathetic good looking idiots get sympathy points.

Battinson: and how would you know this

DG who got adopted by a billionaire who won’t say no to anything he says bc puppy dog eyes: …….

Battinson: …fair point

DG: worlds greatest Detective he says

[abisalli]

putting the bi in Robin

[bet-on-me-13]

The cult of...Danny Fenton?

So! Way back when Danny first moved into his new neighborhood in Gotham, he had some trouble controlling his Powers. The different Types and Levels of Ectoplasm in the air when compared to Amity had thrown off his control.

He was used to being in places where his Ectoplasm meshed well with the Atmosphere, like a Water Balloon in a Pool, but in Gotham that analogy would be closer to a Water Balloon in the sewers. It was too different from what he was used to to fully control his Powers.

So it's understandable that he messed up a few times and his neighbors found out about his Abilities.

They took it well at first, Danny wasn't going to go Rogues or anything, and he never used them maliciously, but eventually they got curious.

They asked what his limits were, how he got them in the first place, and what the hell the Ghost Zone was. The answers "None Really", "I died and was reborn", and "A Collective of every Afterlife at once" did spark some interesting reactions from them.

Most importantly, a few of them joked about him being an Eldritch God that they needed to worship. He was good enough friends with them that at that point they felt comfortable pranking eachother, so they did just that.

Danny woke up one day on his birthday, and saw all of his friends and neighbors surrounding the makeshift Throne they had made and put him on while he was asleep. The entire day they chanted stuff like "The Great One requires Ms. Smiths Apple Pie for his day of birth!" And "The Great One Wishes for us to sing the Ritual Song! Happy Birthday to You! Happy Birth-"

After his birthday, they kept up the joke.

It didn't help that his powers had evolved Again! And now he could bestow abilities onto his friends. The jokes they made about their God granting them Supernatural Powers to rule the world with were insufferable.

Then, one day while he was just resting at home, watching a movie on his TV, he felt a Pull at his Core. The same kind of Pull whenever he was being summoned. But why would they summon hi- Oh Shit! It's Mr Jenkins Party today! He was supposed to meet them at the Warehouse they used for special events an Hour Ago!

He quickly accepted the Summoning, but was met with a suprising sight. His Neighbors all tied up in a pile to his right, a spilled table of party food to his left, and right in front of him, Batman and his Family watching him with wary eyes.

Slowly, he opened his mouth. "...so, did you come for the party or..."